The Bigger Picture - Redux
Like I said earlier, some people don't give you the full story when they call. Sometimes they just forget, sometimes it's deliberate, but it always helps to have as much information about what you're dealing with as possible.
A while ago I took a call from 'Jenny'. Jenny was a bubbly, lively sounding 20 year old. Poor girl had been doing some DIY in her kitchen, she'd stood up too sharply and banged her head. The whole call was punctuated by slightly embarrassed giggles, she really was terribly sweet. She had a small cut from the corner of the cabinet (done it myself, hurts like hell but people are oddly unsympathetic! I now lie and claim I've been attacked by a vampire bat) I ran through the usual slew of questions that we ask on head injury calls. Is your vision impaired? Have you vomited? She said she'd vomited a few times, but this had actually been happening before the knock to her head. Oh really? People- you're going to love this :
me - "Wow, Jenny, it's not your day today is it? Vomiting, head injuries..."
Jenny - "...electrocution..."
me - "ELECTROCUTION?""
Jenny - "Oh yeah, it's the funniest thing! I got a new cooker. The shop wanted £50 to install it, but I'm a student, I haven't got that kind of money. I mean, its electric so I thought I'd just do it myself, it's not like it's gas or anything!"
me - "Go on....."
Jenny - "Well I pulled the old one out, turns out they don't have like.. plugs on, it was attached to the wall. Well the men were coming to take it away so I had to get it out. I grabbed some big scissors to try and cut the wire, and the next thing I know I'm halfway across the kitchen! It was dead weird, there was smoke coming out of my shoe, can you believe it?"
me - "...... No. No I can't......"
Jenny - "My arm feels really funny since then, all tingly. That'll teach me to do DIY when I'm hungover. No wonder I feel so rough today, never again!"
NURSE!!
See, I really do love my job? Who knew that cutting through live mains cables was a bad thing? Bless you Jenny, bless your smokin' little socks.
As ever this post is 100% true, with only the name changed to prevent the innocent. I could write a book filled with stuff like this.
A while ago I took a call from 'Jenny'. Jenny was a bubbly, lively sounding 20 year old. Poor girl had been doing some DIY in her kitchen, she'd stood up too sharply and banged her head. The whole call was punctuated by slightly embarrassed giggles, she really was terribly sweet. She had a small cut from the corner of the cabinet (done it myself, hurts like hell but people are oddly unsympathetic! I now lie and claim I've been attacked by a vampire bat) I ran through the usual slew of questions that we ask on head injury calls. Is your vision impaired? Have you vomited? She said she'd vomited a few times, but this had actually been happening before the knock to her head. Oh really? People- you're going to love this :
me - "Wow, Jenny, it's not your day today is it? Vomiting, head injuries..."
Jenny - "...electrocution..."
me - "ELECTROCUTION?""
Jenny - "Oh yeah, it's the funniest thing! I got a new cooker. The shop wanted £50 to install it, but I'm a student, I haven't got that kind of money. I mean, its electric so I thought I'd just do it myself, it's not like it's gas or anything!"
me - "Go on....."
Jenny - "Well I pulled the old one out, turns out they don't have like.. plugs on, it was attached to the wall. Well the men were coming to take it away so I had to get it out. I grabbed some big scissors to try and cut the wire, and the next thing I know I'm halfway across the kitchen! It was dead weird, there was smoke coming out of my shoe, can you believe it?"
me - "...... No. No I can't......"
Jenny - "My arm feels really funny since then, all tingly. That'll teach me to do DIY when I'm hungover. No wonder I feel so rough today, never again!"
NURSE!!
See, I really do love my job? Who knew that cutting through live mains cables was a bad thing? Bless you Jenny, bless your smokin' little socks.
As ever this post is 100% true, with only the name changed to prevent the innocent. I could write a book filled with stuff like this.
When I was very young, my grandfather told me that a piece of toast had lodged in his toaster and it was burning all the time so he asked me to remove it.
I put my hand in several times, only to withdraw it sharply because "something bit me". I was being shocked by a very dodgy toaster. My mother was furious and for sometime time harboured a suspicion that this was related to the fact that that grandfather had an insurance policy on each of us children.
I was very young. Even I would have had my doubts if he had asked me to cut a live electrical cable with scissors.
Regards - Shinga
Posted by
Unknown |
5:24 pm
Yikes, poor thing. Hope you didn't develop a lifelong fear of toasters!
I used to have faith in human intelligence, but people electrocuting themselves, 'tasting' cleaning products ("But it smelled just like oranges!"), and jumping off walls 'for a laugh', have made me fear for the future of mankind!
Posted by
Sick Sad Minion |
5:51 pm
Please, please do write a book. I would buy at least ten of them (to give them to friends of course).
On the other hand you could just publish it on the internet for free...
Posted by
x |
7:12 pm
Feel free to print anything out you find amusing!
The other half is nagging me to write a book. Early retirement on the back of my angst? Unlikely!
Posted by
Sick Sad Minion |
8:24 pm
I'd buy a copy! :)
Posted by
KindaBlue |
9:42 pm
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